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TGS- pg 1 by *xAshleyMx:iconxAshleyMx:

Categories Scraps

©2007-2009 *xAshleyMx
:iconxashleymx:

Artist's Comments

i wasn't gonna submit this till later, but i deceided to be nice and submit it anyway.
This is just page 1, i will submit the the other pages later, when i feel like it.
This page is narrated by Valentine.
the whole comic is gonna be narrated by Valentine.

hehe, common disease. XD
If i made any typos, point them out.
BTW, don't ask who the black dog is, i will introduce his purpose later on.
yay, Scarface


Characters and comic (c) ME
and only me

NO ONE WORD COMMENTS OR CRAPPY COMMMENTS

Comments


love 0 0 joy 0 0 wow 0 0 mad 0 0 sad 0 0 fear 0 0 neutral 0 0
:iconchibi-mimi:
=Chibi-Mimi Apr 22, 2007, 11:13:16 AM
:rofl: shave Timmy's head XD
Nice idea. xDDD

this is good so far. :popcorn:
:iconirksplee:
~IrkSplee Apr 22, 2007, 11:14:38 AM
You said point out typos, so... the "On a hot day, in our town, starts like every other day." That's all kinds of awkward. I'd say drop the on and the commas and it'll be all kinds of fine.

That little nitpick aside, I like ending a page on a cliffhanger of sorts like you did here. Makes people anticipate the next page... but work at your own pace on that one. Can't wait to see where this is headed. I like looking at your dog drawings and the one-shot comics, and now we get a story about 'em! ^_^

--
Hey, I still have my dignit- WOO! AN APPLE! *munchmunchmunch*
:icondarfix:
~Darfix Apr 22, 2007, 11:21:05 AM
Well, shaving Timmy's head would certainly be a way to quell boredom for a moment, but you certainly have a knack for catching the reader's attention right from the start xD

You have me anxious for more ;)

--
Member of:
:heart: ~xAshleyMx-Fan-Club
:+fav: ~Oha-fc

Darfix
Your everyday "Border Husky" solution ;p
:iconedwardkelsey:
*EdwardKelsey Apr 22, 2007, 11:22:04 AM
Wouldn't Timmy be pissed if you shaved his head? Anyway, good luck on making the rest of your comic, I like it so far.

--
Remember:
We are a family; you learn from me and I learn from you--Gloria Jackson
:icondarfix:
~Darfix Apr 22, 2007, 11:23:59 AM
BTW, the ears on the black dog at first gave me the impression he was a large feline, but that has happened to me before :p

--
Member of:
:heart: ~xAshleyMx-Fan-Club
:+fav: ~Oha-fc

Darfix
Your everyday "Border Husky" solution ;p
:iconxashleymx:
*xAshleyMx Apr 22, 2007, 11:24:52 AM
yeah, that was the one i noticed
but hey, i don't have perfect grammer, ^^;
thank you for pointing that out.
:iconsantte:
~Santte Apr 22, 2007, 11:35:05 AM
Drug Dealers: oh sh** were found out...

--
Go to sonicbluespeeds page for anime and video game art! -------> [link] <-------

-------------------------------

You think youre too cool for school? Well news flash,
Walter Kronkite.....................Youre not...
:icontcstarwind:
~TCStarwind Apr 22, 2007, 11:47:05 AM
I can already tell that this is going to be a great comic. :3 Like IrkSplee said, drop the "on" in the first sentence. The commas should be left where they're at. And after "common disease known to man" you should add an 'as' so that it aligns with "pure boredom".

--
"You brace yourself for a punch to the face, someone throws a pie at you. You ready for that pie, someone shits in your hat." -~A-S-m-i-t-h
:iconsynduo:
*SynDuo Apr 22, 2007, 11:55:20 AM
I love your word play ^^ Nice First page

--
★ Aim for the Cosmos -*SynDuo
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April 22, 2007
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